I've always thought that playing the "Requiem for a Dream" song over any video instantly turns that video into something creepy and eerie. So, I found a video of some kittehs playing. Mute the video on the right, and enjoy.
Poor little guy. He’s like the Old Yeller of the 21st century.
I don’t even know where to start. We’ve got the 1th Friday of the Month, the PC Hottest DJ, yo my main man, and “Live” in quotes (Milly-Vanilly?). Also, “HUNDREDS WILL JAM”….BUT ONLY ONE WILL SURVIVE!!!
So….maybe don’t give your product a name that is a combination of ‘queef’ and ‘elf’, k?
Alcohol + Call of Duty + Microphone = Quotable quotes.
“Your mom has a Harrier….vagina.”
“Take those busted-ass guns back to the Black Pearl, you bitch.”
“Does anybody on our team speak terrorist, or are we the good guys?”
“Hey is anyone else getting fatigued knuckles?”
“Hahaaaa. You suck at games. Video games in particular. Probably suck at board games, too.”
“Who the fuck is using a GameShark? They’re putting in codes as we speak. Either that, or their mothers are wizards. Wizard whores.”
“I went 7-14 cuz I was playing with my dick last round. What the fuck were you doing?”
“This is fucking retarded. I shouldn’t even be playing this at a functioning level.”
“The only thing you’re positive is fucking HIV positive, you fucking asshole. You fucked my mom in the ass. Maybe you’re just so used to your boyfriend that you don’t know where else to put it, you gay bitch.”
“Motherfucker, you’re 44 in real life, you goddamn old-ass bitch.”
“That’s 3 in a row. You guys suck infant dick.”
“Next person I see, you’re getting your dick shot clean off. You’re not even going to die; you’re just going to finish this round without a dick.”
J: “You’ve already had half a bottle of wine.”
T: “I get Superman drunk.”
J: “That doesn’t really make sense. Aquaman drunk is probably more appropriate.”
A few nights ago, a car drove by that sounded like a 340-year old mattress on wheels. The picture below is Steve’s visual interpretation of that mental image.
Most of these aren’t necessarily funny; they’re just damned good ideas that someone should make happen. More of these will come in the future, because we have good ideas and shit.
1. A seafood restaurant named “Bass-to-Mouth”
2. Dr. Snooze books: transcripts from C-SPAN illustrated by Dr. Seuss
3. DreamSync: a device that allows two or more people to have the same dream, and interact with each other in the dream
4. Bring back ’sire’ and ‘my lady’ in place of ’sir’ and ‘madam’
5. BrainBlog: a blog that automatically updates with every thought you have
6. A breakfast delivery service called “Breakfast in Bed”
7. RateMyCop.com: website where people can rate cops that they deal with
8. RateMyMonstertruck.com: pretty self-explanatory
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Funny. Because we say so.